I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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