So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
