i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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