I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
