: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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