I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Randomize
