did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
