Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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