I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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