you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Randomize
