i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
FUCK WHALES
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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