Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
3 2 1 whiskey
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
