You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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