Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Randomize
