Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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