I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
