Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
