I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
