It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize
