His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
Life is so much better after having sex.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
