Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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