I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize
