If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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