ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
