the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
