Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
this will be a night to untag.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
