I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
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