Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
