12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
