So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize