I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
