barbara walters just said penis...
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
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