Already got asked if we're dating
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
