she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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