accomplished twins. life is a go
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
