But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Randomize
