She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize
