i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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