someone get that fucking seahorse.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
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