Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
