How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
