College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
