hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
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