Soap is not a condiment
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
