Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
No stitches, just platelets and will power
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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