I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
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