He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
