I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Randomize
