cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
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