this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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