Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
