frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
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