i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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