batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
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