Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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