Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
