She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Randomize